Photos
Quotes
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Ron Fox : [upon seeing Harold] What's up with the guy with the weird eyes? He handicapped or something?
Deputy Frye : We believe he's of Korean decent.
Ron Fox : My God. North Korea and Al Qaeda working together. This is bigger than I thought.
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Goldstein : Don't insult us, alright? I don't know what the hell's going on here, but I'm pleading the 5th until I speak to my lawyer.
Ron Fox : Oh, you plead the 5th, huh? Beecher, get me a copy of the Bill of Rights.
Dr. Beecher : The Bill of Rights? Why?
Ron Fox : Just do it!
[Beecher leaves room]
Ron Fox : 5 right?
Rosenberg : 5, sure.
Goldstein : 5 alive.
Ron Fox : Okay.
[Beecher comes in with the Bill of Rights]
Ron Fox : [undoing his pants] You want to know what I think of the 5th Amendment?
[rips off paper and wipes his ass with it]
Ron Fox : [holding up paper with crap smeared on it] There it is. That's what I think of the 5th Amendment.
Goldstein : Why the hell is your ass so dirty? Don't you wipe?
Ron Fox : Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to buddy.
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Harold Lee : Please, sir. This is all a big mistake.
[referring to Kumar]
Harold Lee : My idiot friend here brought marijuana on the plane.
Ron Fox : Zip it, Hello Kitty! We know your operation's funded by drugs!
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Ron Fox : Do you have a problem with the way I run the show, Beecher?
Dr. Beecher : I'm just saying I looked through the files on Harold Lee and Kumar Patel. They were both born and raised in New Jersey. Other than a couple of traffic tickets, they're clean.
Ron Fox : Oh, right! That's why they just broke out of prison!
Dr. Beecher : It's not even clear that they should've been there in the first place!
Ron Fox : [growing flustered] Shouldn't have...
[walks over to desk and picks up a picture of a little girl]
Ron Fox : You see this cute little white girl, Beecher?
Dr. Beecher : Yeah.
Ron Fox : Do you want her to get raped and murdered?
Dr. Beecher : Of course not.
Ron Fox : You sure? Cause this is America. Do you want to rape America?
Dr. Beecher : No.
Ron Fox : Then stop fucking with me!
[throws picture against wall]
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Deputy Frye : I assume Secretary Whitmore is coming?
Ron Fox : Negative. He's on an ice fishing trip in Glacier Bay. I'm in charge while he's gone.
Dr. Beecher : Well, shouldn't he be alerted? Isn't this issue of more importance than an ice fishing trip?
Ron Fox : Who are you again?
Dr. Beecher : Dr. John Beecher, Vice Chairman of the NSA.
Ron Fox : Yeah, well, listen Dr. Dipshit - you've obviously never been ice fishing before.
Dr. Beecher : No, I haven't.
Ron Fox : Well it's fucking exhilarating.
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Harold Lee : Can we have the right to make a phone call?
Ron Fox : Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry. You want rights now. You want freedoms. Right now. Is it time? Is it freedom o'clock?
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Ron Fox : Neil... Patrick... Harris.
Neil Patrick Harris : Yo.
Ron Fox : It is an honor to meet you, sir.
Neil Patrick Harris : Yeah, I would imagine so.