Summer Rental (1985)
John Candy: Jack Chester
Photos
Quotes
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Jack Chester : Get the hell out of here now!
Fat Man : You get out of here fella. I'm trying to watch the Smurfs.
Jack Chester : You're trying to watch the Smurfs?
Fat Man : Yeah.
Jack Chester : Did you see the one where Papa Smurf took a crutch and smashed the shit out of a guy with a red hat? Did you see that one? You want to see that one?
[Fat Man runs away]
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Scully : [Discussing the ocean] She'll make ya rich, or she'll feed ya to the fishes. If she wants you to dance, sonny boy, you've got to follow her lead.
Jack Chester : Didn't I read that on your bathroom wall?
Scully : Yes. And it's as true today as when I hung it there.
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Scully : Hey mate! Good to see you. What can I get ya?
Jack Chester : How about... drunk.
Scully : [laughing] We can handle that!
Jack Chester : [receives shot of rum] Do you have an ice cube for this?
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Jack Chester : Can you tread water with that hook?
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Jack Chester : Don't serve those.
Al : What are you doing?
Jack Chester : These are my lobsters.
Al : Your lobsters?
Jack Chester : That's right you've got my table but you're not getting my lobsters.
Al : Oh and this is your table?
Jack Chester : [Slams his hands on the table] My table!
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Vicki : Can I have your honest opinion about something?
Jack Chester : Sure.
Vicki : [lifts her bikini top] What do you think of these? Well, how do they look?
Jack Chester : About what?
Vicki : These!
Jack Chester : Oh, those.
Vicki : Yeah. How do they look?
Jack Chester : Uh, similar?
Vicki : No, I mean, do they look good? I just got them.
Jack Chester : Who had them before you?
Vicki : Nobody, silly. I just recently had them enlarged.
Jack Chester : Oh, I see.
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Jack Chester : Where's Angus with that sail? There's only two more shopping days left.
Scully : He's searching the entire coast for it. I'm sure he'll find it.
Jack Chester : How can you be so sure?
Scully : If he don't, I'll kill him.
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Jack Chester : [Jack has spilled a huge bag of dog food all over the floor and is trying to clean it up] Do you have a dustpan or something?
Dan Gardner : You can just leave it sir.
Jack Chester : Good idea, because you might have a guest this summer and they have a dog and this is excellent stuff.
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Jack Chester : Should she be talking to him?
Sandy Chester : Why not?
Jack Chester : Why not? Are you crazy? He's a life guard. They're all sex maniacs. Right now each of his gonads is screaming me first.
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Ed : I'm sorry, mister, but she's worrying the whole world with her new knockers.
Vicki : Oh, be quiet, Ed. I just want his opinion.
Ed : She's so insecure! Last night, she shoved them in the clerk's face at the 7-11, Honey, relax, will you. They're beautiful. They look right and they feel right!
Vicki : Yeah?
Ed : Mister, will you try them and tell her they feel right? As a favor to me?
Jack Chester : [cops of feel] Oh, yeah. Boy those are so lifelike it's ridiculous.
Ed : See. Everybody likes 'em. Thanks, buddy, I owe you one.
Jack Chester : What are neighbors for.
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Scully : There's nothing like the sea to lift your spirits and put a song in your heart.
Jack Chester : I know what you mean. You must know a lot of ocean songs.
Scully : I do. Here's a sea ditty my mother taught me.
[singing]
Scully : Love, Exciting and new, Come aboard, We're expecting you, And love, Life's sweetest reward, Let if flow
Jack Chester , Scully : It flows back to you, The Love Boat...
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Jack Chester : I love you Scully. That's not the booze talkin' either.
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Jack Chester : Come on Hal. Can't you pull a few strings for me?
Hal : It's not on my hands. The agency gave you a mandatory five. Look Jack, you've been landing planes for 13 years. Face it, you're burned out. It's not a dirty word in this business. I'm telling you this as a friend, you need this rest.
Jack Chester : I can't believe they're doing this! Just because of a stinking fly.
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Jennifer Chester : Did they even say how many rooms they're are?
Jack Chester : It's three bedrooms and it's on the beach. That's all I know.
Sandy Chester : Well it was very nice of Hal to find the place.
Jack Chester : It was very nice of him to tell me that I'm cracking up.
Sandy Chester : You are not cracking up. You just need this rest.
Jack Chester : Rest? Didn't we just get back from Hawaii?
Sandy Chester : Jack, that was our honeymoon.
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Jack Chester : Oh, gee, I forgot my bathing suit. I guess I can't go in the water all summer.
Sandy Chester : Jack, nobody cares what you look like in a bathing suit.
[spanks Jack's behind]
Jack Chester : That's just it.
Sandy Chester : I'm going to pick one up for you.
Jack Chester : Well, I'm not going to wear it. Not until I lose, maybe, 3 or 4 pounds.
Sandy Chester : I love the way you look in a bathing suit.
[kiss]
Jack Chester : My mother was right, you're twisted.
Sandy Chester : Mmm-hmm.
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Jack Chester : I'd take those over a power tool any day.
Vicki : Do they look like real breasts to you?
[does a shimmy]
Jack Chester : Well, you fooled me!
Vicki : You don't think they're too big?
Jack Chester : No! No, no, no, no.
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Jack Chester : Your wrong. You're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong!
Scully : I'm trying to tell you that as a fighter, pound for pound, my boy, Jimmy Cagney, will disintegrate your Sylvester Stallone. He'll knock his block off!
Jack Chester : In a street fight, maybe. I give you that. But, not in a movie!
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Sandy Chester : Jack, you spend all of your time with Scully. What do the two of you do all day?
Jack Chester : Dance.
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Jack Chester : [everybody is walking by the window in the Chester's house] Excuse me! Why are you people going through here
[a fat man belches and points to a sign that says "Public Beach Access"]
Jack Chester : Oh perfect.
[to the crowds]
Jack Chester : Come on thru. I'm Joe Public, welcome to my beach.
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Jack Chester : Your wife's on my Wham-O.
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Jack Chester : Where do you think you're going? This isn't a nude beach.
Jennifer Chester : Oh, Daddy!
Jack Chester : Who do you think you are? Lolita?
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Vicki : I just made some fresh lemonade. Why don't you come on over and have some?
Jack Chester : Oh, no.
Vicki : Oh, come on!
Jack Chester : No. I wouldn't want to impose.
Vicki : Impose! What are neighbors for? Come on.