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65 (2023)
Gather 'round, dear friends, and lend me your ears as I spin a yarn of a fateful tale - a tale of a movie, forgettable and bleak, that failed to stir the soul
Behold, a tale of visual sorcery, an enchanting realm born from the power of computer-generated imagery. A world of prehistoric beasts brought to life with remarkable detail, a spectacle that leaves the senses awe-struck. Yes, CGI was the saving grace of this tale, a glimmer of hope that kept the flickering flame of interest alive.
However, dear reader, the magic ended there. For the art of storytelling, a vital ingredient of cinematic wonder, was non-existent. The plot, simple and unremarkable, failed to captivate the imagination, and the script was a barren wasteland devoid of depth and substance.
And alas, let us not forget the abundance of plot holes that riddled this production like a swarm of locusts. Especially concerning the technological aspects of the narrative, the inconsistencies were aplenty, leaving one to ponder in confusion.
A flick that fails to entertain or engage, not even in the realm of "so bad, it's good" like Godzilla vs. Kong. Nay, this is a journey that one would be better off avoiding altogether.
It is true that the realm of dinosaur movies is a scarce one, and competent ones even rarer. But heed my words, dear reader, and enter this realm with caution, lest you become lost in the wasteland of a poorly crafted story.
Secret Headquarters (2022)
No
This is not a family movie, this is a kids movie.
I only decided to watch it because of Owen Wilson, but I wholeheartedly regret that now.
This is not a comedy. Most of the jokes and one-liners are cringe. I don't like to throw this word around, but it fits here.
The Sandman (2022)
I don't read comics.
A couple of years ago I stopped watching book adaptations. I'm an avid reader, and I can't remember the last time I wasn't disappointed by an adaptation.
The only reason I made exception in this case is that this show is based on a comic, and I don't read them. Can't get into it.
I'm certain that the comic is better than the show is, and that people who are disappointed by the show have good reason to be. I was in their place many times before.
In my opinion, this show is pretty good. Especially the first six episodes, after that it loses some of it's steam.
I was disappointed that we didn't visit more dark dreams.
Same with the main character. We hardly see him use his powers and even when he does, he doesn't appear like the all powerful king of dreams.
There is some unneeded filler in there, in my opinion, or at least pacing issues. Some characters that feel important are discarded or forgotten after just one episode. They are probably saving them for future seasons, but it felt very jarring.
The acting of some actors was not very good. It didn't feel high budget. In some places, it felt like a CW teen show.
It might seem like I'm being overly critical, but I did enjoy the show. It is easier to remember and write down flaws.
Prey (2022)
Disappointing ending.
It was watchable.
Cinematography, choreography was nice. Even CGI was passable.
The script was poor, but I didn't expect anything different from it.
That ending though......
It was unsatisfying and felt undeserved.
Mostly because of inconsistent power level of the Predator.
In the first 2/3rds of the movie he is an unbeatable monster. Then he continuously gets dumber and weaker as the movie progresses.
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
The MCU worries me.
This movie is something else...
Although it is mostly comedic, I did not laugh once.
The jokes and gags had no impact at all.
Thor: Ragnarok is one of my favorite MCU films, and I often enjoy Taika Waititi's movies, but this one was a stinker.
Cristian Bale was completely wasted on this movie. His screen time was negligible.
After the opening scene, I thought this movie might actually go to cool places, but I was severely disappointed.
Phase 4 features six movies thus far.
(Black Widow, Shang-Chi, Eternals, Spider-Man, Doctor Strange, and Thor).
Four of them are either awful or mediocre.
Shang-Chi is somewhere between ok and meh.
Spider-Man was the only movie I actually enjoyed, and only because it is nostalgia porn.
I may really quit watching Marvel movies entirely if this trend continues.
I have already skipped most of their Disney+ shows, because they are not worthy of my time,
The Boys: The Instant White-Hot Wild (2022)
Pointless season
Nothing really happened.
Soldier Boy is sleeping again.
Starlight and Hughie are together once again.
Kimiko has her powers back.
Homelander is alive and kicking.
This season had some cool scenes and that's about it.
If you skipped this season and will watch s4 after s2, you would not miss anything. Some people would probably not even realize there was a season in between.
They saved Homelander, because a kid got a bruise on his head? Not to mention that even if they let SB blast HL with the kid, they would not die, it would only strip their powers.
How did the kid's lasers threw Solder Boy into the wall, when Butcher's lasers did nothing to him, even though he shot them straight to his face?
Kimiko went from feeling bad for killing russian mobsters to killing people who were just doing their job, while listening to music and dancing really quick.
How did Maeve survive the fall from the building, even though she lost her powers and was human? That fall definitely looks bigger than 30 meters, which has 100% mortality rate. It wouldn't even matter if she turned 1 meter above ground. The momentum of the fall would be the same.
Jurassic World Dominion (2022)
Beating a dead dinosaur...
This feels like some B sharknado movie, only with a bigger budget. Completely ridiculous and stupid.
Copy of the first movie, just longer and worse.
I have a bad feeling this series will walk in Fast and Furious's footsteps.
Stranger Things: Chapter Nine: The Piggyback (2022)
Power of love and friendship wins again...
I feel like a broken record, but the only things I notice in current movies and TV shows are plot holes or characters without a brain.
I have seen/read so many things where friendship or love triumphs all evil, that I think I have enough for the rest of my life.
Although this season had several fantastic elements, the narrative and dialogues, which were the most crucial, were terrible.
When three people are walking together, one frequently pulls ahead.
This is ridiculous on its own, but writers do it so the other two may chat privately.
I immediately rolled my eyes every time I saw that, since I knew I would have to sit through some dreadful, frustrating exchanges.
Some events don't make any sense to me.
Eddie died for nothing. People being choked by tentacles for ±20 minutes and so on. (Edit: It was 31m.)
Important characters are immortal in this show.
I don't need them to make this GoT, but sometimes they should just let some people stay dead. Wasn't this 3rd character that "died", just to magically survive? (Edit: It was 4th.) Not to mention that 11 is Jesus now and can resurrect people. I guess the next season will be without stakes at all. Or they magically take that ability away from her. "It was just one time thing."
One more thing. I can't take Will seriously (even in an emotional scene). He looks like an oversized baby with his bowl cut. I have seen my fair share of movies from the 70s and 80s, but I don't think I saw that haircut on people older than 10.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
Most likely the weakest MCU film to date.
There was an absurdly high level of plot armor and a general lack of basic logic.
The film completely disregarded Wanda's character development in WandaVision.
She also managed to forget the magic she had learned there.
Power scaling is a joke in this one. They unironically let Captain Marvel die from a statue falling on her. That's just one example.
The existence of this movie would not be possible if people actually used their brains.
People not shooting when they have clear line of sight.
When the enemy is confined, people just stand there doing nothing.
They decide to take action when they are freed.
Instead of slaying the film's villain, someone stabs a book.
That villain decided to "sleep" in an enemy fortress while there were numerous people around.
Same villain collapsing mountain onto themselves, instead just destroying it from outside.
Problem-solving methods that are too convenient
As an illustration:
Your magic book was destroyed.
No problem.
It was only a copy.
I am aware of the location of the original.
In totally inconspicuous, definitely not man-made edifice/mountain.
Only I, who has studied certain ancient, classified manuscripts, is aware of Its whereabouts. Additionally, no satellite detected it.
The only intriguing aspect of this film was its aesthetics.
And even those don't look great and seem rather "plasticky."
I'm not sure if it's simply that as I become older and have different standards, but I expect a lot more from movies.
The Lost City (2022)
Nothing makes sense in this movie.
You come upon some old pictures of ladies under a waterfall and don't bother to go around the perimeter to see if there's anything else? This bad guy is something else.
You must save someone who has been taped to a chair.
Instead of three rapid knife slashes, you go get a cart, put that individual with the chair on that cart, and then begin escaping with it.
You've been buried alive in a stone tomb with a lid that weighs at least half a ton, if not more.
You manage to raise the lid with nothing but a crowbar and then push the lid away with your bare hands while still laying in the tomb.
Even the manner the protagonist exits the vehicle as the driver loses control is dubious.
There's a lot of that kind of nonsense around here.
For example, teleporting a biker to the cliff's brink so that his blinded companion can crash into him.
I'm all for artistic freedom and license, but this isn't it.
This is writers neglecting logic, physics, and the viewer's common sense and intellect.
I could overlook certain things if the movie was at least funny.
It isn't, though.
Moon Knight: Gods and Monsters (2022)
I don't recall seeing a more mediocre and unsatisfying conclusion in a long time.
Average, uninspiring, clichéd, meh.
Those are some of the terms used in certain reviews.
However, several of those reviewers still give it a 7/10.
Sorry, but in what universe is a 7/10 average?
Yes, this episode is extremely average, which is why it should get a 5/10.
However, considering the ending of this finale is even worse, I will give it a 4/10. No, the post-credit scene has no bearing on this.
The Breakfast Club (1985)
I really liked it, but...
This is the first time I've seen it.
There's a lot to enjoy about this film.
That moment where everyone sits in a circle and speaks about their difficulties, for example, is incredible.
I'm disappointed that I can't give this film a higher rating.
The conclusion felt hurried and incomplete.
At one point, characters are yelling at each other, hurling obscenities, and declaring their hatred for one another.
Then they're together in the following scene, kissing each other.
At least 20 minutes of character development is absent from the movie.
This film might have been a masterpiece if it had been longer and the characters had been fleshed out further.
Ousama Ranking: A Promise to the Demon (2022)
Writing is atrocious.
#This is my review for entire anime, I'm just putting it here too, because this episode is big reason why I don't like it.#
The first half of the anime was amazing, but later, when we were getting some answers to our questions, it slowly went into the gutters
The reason for this anime's plot existence, is a country, where every person is bad, robbed and then killed Miranjo's mom.
This entire scenario in the show is soooo unbelievably anserine, that it ruined the show for me. And this episode was the last nail in the coffin.
Miranjo's people did a lot for this "bad" nation. They build houses, gave them stuff, educated them, taught them magic. There is no way those people would then still want to rob people. Yes, you would maybe find a few psychopaths, but not the whole damn city/country.
With their education and magic, they were probably earning very good money. There was literally no need/reason to rob/kill people, all their needs were met, there was probably even abundance. Not to mention that with education naturally arrives some sort of government, doesn't matter if it is democracy, monarchy, or dictatorship. With government, of course came institutions and law enforcement, which wouldn't let citizens do whatever they want.
They were written as evil characters, just for the sake of it, which is the laziest and stupidest way to do that.
It's weird that author/writer allows some people to change, like Daida, Miranjo, Bosse, blue shirt guy with metal hand, guy with the spear. On the other hand, they wrote that an entire country is a bunch of criminals who are not capable of change. Writer/author is either very racist, or should stop writing and go work in McDonald's.
Miranjo attacked the kingdom two times and because of her hundreds if not thousands of people are dead. What happens to her at the end? She is revived, she is forgiven, because she said sorry, and becomes queen of the kingdom in which most dead people are dead because of her. (I'm not joking, this is what happens.) What's the point of this story? Rewarding mass murderers? Actions have no consequences?
I'm definitely not going to watch season 2. There are a lot of other things I can watch with better writing.
Ousama Ranking (2021)
Writing is atrocious.
The first half of the anime was amazing, but later, when we were getting some answers to our questions, it slowly went into the gutters
The reason for this anime's plot existence, is a country, where every person is bad, robbed and then killed Miranjo's mom.
This entire scenario in the show is soooo unbelievably anserine, that it ruined the show for me.
Miranjo's people did a lot for this "bad" nation. They build houses, gave them stuff, educated them, taught them magic. There is no way those people would then still want to rob people. Yes, you would maybe find a few psychopaths, but not the whole damn city/country.
With their education and magic, they were probably earning very good money. There was literally no need/reason to rob/kill people, all their needs were met, there was probably even abundance. Not to mention that with education naturally arrives some sort of government, doesn't matter if it is democracy, monarchy, or dictatorship. With government, of course came institutions and law enforcement, which wouldn't let citizens do whatever they want.
They were written as evil characters, just for the sake of it, which is the laziest and stupidest way to do that.
It's weird that author/writer allows some people to change, like Daida, Miranjo, Bosse, blue shirt guy with metal hand, guy with the spear. On the other hand, they wrote that an entire country is a bunch of criminals who are not capable of change. Writer/author is either very racist, or should stop writing and go work in McDonald's.
Miranjo attacked the kingdom two times and because of her hundreds if not thousands of people are dead. What happens to her at the end? She is revived, she is forgiven, because she said sorry, and becomes queen of the kingdom in which most dead people are dead because of her. (I'm not joking, this is what happens.) What's the point of this story? Rewarding mass murderers? Actions have no consequences?
I'm definitely not going to watch season 2. There are a lot of other things I can watch with better writing.
I gave it three stars, because it has some good emotional scenes and likable main character.
The King's Man (2021)
Average action flick
I gave it an extra point because of a certain plot factor, it actually surprised me. Other than that, it doesn't really have anything more worth mentioning.
Choreography of fights is not good, except maybe for the final fight, which ended very anticlimactically, so it's not a win either.
The Adam Project (2022)
I feel like people are too harsh on this movie.
Yes, you kind of need to turn off your brain during this, but I would say that's expected, just like for most of the time traveling movies.
People either like Ryan Reynolds or hate him. I live in the first camp. Most of his movies are good in my opinion.
I didn't know Jennifer Garner and Zoe Saldana were in this. That was a nice surprise.
Overall, it's an enjoyable movie, if you like Ryan Reynolds and know what to expect from him, and from the time travelling plot.
Lifeforce (1985)
I kind of liked first 2/3 of the movie.
The movie started fantastic with people finding an alien spaceship. I love plots like that. Even later, when people were trying to figure out what's happening on Earth, it was pretty good. When we got to the part where the girl got tracked to the hospital, everything shattered. I don't know the exact reason, but that was the point when I just stopped caring. This continued throughout the rest of the movie. One of the reasons might be that characters had way too much plot armor. Idk
Pretty solid start, but then it felt really flat for my taste and the ending was underwhelming.
Resident Alien: Girls' Night (2022)
My review got deleted.
My previous 2* review got deleted. Idk why. It was up for 2 weeks, and suddenly it is gone. There was nothing wrong with it. Somebody probably got butt hurt, because it had a lot of up votes.
I'm changing my rating from 2 to 1* because of it. Nobody is going around deleting 9 and 10* star reviews, that's for sure.
I don't feel like rewriting my old review, because it was long, and I don't care that much anymore.
Here is a short version:
This is one of the worst episodes of any show I have ever seen. I would rather go and watch GoT finale all over again, just to avoid this.
The Ice Age Adventures of Buck Wild (2022)
Pointless.
The first 3 Ice Age movies are great family movies that kids and adults can enjoy alike. I rewatched them recently, so I don't think it's my nostalgia speaking.
This, in my opinion, is the worst Ice Age movie (for now). After the previous movie from 2016 I didn't think that was possible, but here we are.
The Ice Age Adventures of Buck Wild is a genuinely bad movie, and it doesn't help that it's not geared towards a family. I didn't feel a thing while watching this. Show it to some kid who is 12y old or younger, and you will maybe get some reaction or laugh from them. Adults will not find anything in here, only unanswered questions and disappointment.
Animation is terrible. Ice Age 2, which is 16 years old right now, has better animation than this. In some ways, even Ice Age 1 looks better. I know that this is "straight to steaming" movie, but I don't care, we are talking about Disney here.
Dota: Dragon's Blood (2021)
Very enjoyable
Let me just say at the start that I don't play Dota 2 or even League of Legends.
The first season was a little chaotic, but after watching season 2 I feel like it found some road, and it's following it.
This is very subjective, but I even kind of prefer this show over the Arcane. Which is an amazing show with awesome animation. I gave both shows 8*, but if I had to pick one, I would take Dota.
I just prefer fantasy, high fantasy settings. Arcane is steampunk/sci-fi, with low fantasy sprinkled in between.
Dexter: New Blood: Sins of the Father (2022)
GoT all over again.
I was expecting this...and I was afraid of this...
I think I understand what they were trying to "tell" us with this ending. This review by bayleykeder explains it pretty well.
Https://www.imdb.com/review/rw7736248/
My only complaint is about the execution of this finale. Cheap and rushed would be the words I would use.
There was something missing. It felt like between this and the previous episode should be another whole season, or at least a couple of episodes.
Yes, I think Dexter deserved to die, and I was anticipating his dead would be caused by his son.
My belief is that it could be substantially more impactful if the writers took a different approach, from what they have shown us, while taking their time with the characters.
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)
better than 2016
It was watchable, and it had some cool scenes, but there wasn't anything exceptional about the movie. There were a lot of times when I was scratching my head, though.
I don't believe for one second that Egon had to run and do everything by himself. Why didn't other Ghostbusters believe him?? Your only job is to fight ghosts and when one of your members tells you that he found some evidence of some large scale ghost disaster, you are not even going to check it out??? Hello???
When Egon died, his daughter is getting evicted at the same time. That's a pretty big coincidence. Yes, it could happen, but I consider that lazy writing.
Since when, having a couple of decades old jokes have been enough to consider the movie as a comedy?
Why were the main protagonists kids?? The kids didn't bring anything to the table. We got 2 very short school scenes, but even then they weren't doing anything school related. Why couldn't they be adults, or even better, why wasn't their mom the main protagonist. That would be so much better. We could have seen her financial struggle, problems with kids, romance with that teacher, hatred for her father. All of this would be so much more fleshed out and interesting. Instead, we got some kids doing "kids" stuff. Not even that, the kids were believable maybe like my cat dressed up as a lion.
The villain was the same from the previous movie. I wanted to see something new.
The cameo of the old cast was cool to see, until I realized it was only plot armor for the current characters.
Still better than that 2016 train wreck, and if you turn off your brain, you might even enjoy it.
Finch (2021)
Not everything needs villains, heroes, or conflict.
This was a very enjoyable watch, and after it was done I didn't feel like it wasted my time at all. Very predictable and you could tell how the movies will go from a mile away.
It has some kind of charm, and I couldn't look away. Most of that can be attributed to Jeff and the relationship/interactions with Finch. I loved watching that.
Don't Look Up (2021)
Acting doesn't save it.
Idk what to think of this one.
The first 15 minutes are interesting and the last 10m were watchable, but everything in between is a big turd. It didn't grip me at all.
This is supposed to be comedy, but I didn't laugh once, not even a chuckle. It felt more like a parody, but that can't be right either, because people can usually laugh at parodies.
All that stuff about social networks they use to appease the young crowd, who wants to watch or listen to that? It's not funny. A lot of movies do that nowadays, and I'm sick of that.
The only good thing I can say about the movie is that the acting was pretty good, which is not surprising.
I don't know what would save this movie. They should probably either go with a more serious tone or be an actual comedy.
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)
Watchable
It has a couple of cool fights, and the CGI fest at the end was fun. Other than that, it doesn't offer anything else.
No character development.
No meaningful story.