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Ticket to Paradise (2022)
Cooney and Roberts on fire
As a youngster i skipped school several times to see Pretty Woman and have always loved Julia Roberts acting, I would watch just for Julia Roberts and to a lesser extent George Cooney.
This movie is a very relaxed storyline about eloping and reuniting. BUT it's just average when you take out the chemistry between Roberts/Clooney. They bring the comedy and chemistry in old school rom com perfection. There are cameo's from other people famous from other various tv shows/movies but once again noone else really brings anything meaningfull to the table nor does the storyline, only Cooney and Roberts deliver.
The scenery is nice tho.
Weird: The Al Yankovic Story (2022)
Definately Weird Al.
It goes "WAY" over the top for the most part but that was the charm of Weird Al. To start with it seems like a typical biopic of a musicians life and there are parts that are completely true but quickly becomes apparent that like his music and the other movies/tv shows he's been involved with, it's all a parody taken to extremes.
The acting is great/comedic for the most part, the singing is done by Weird Al himself (overdubbed on Daniel Radcliff). Radcliffe looks the part as does the celebrities he meets along the way, obviously with alot of parody of them thrown in
Daniel in the lead role nails Al's manuerisms.
Not much more to say. It was an enjoyable laugh from begining to end.
The Good Neighbor (2016)
Weak and too slow
No redeeming values.
Two kids decide to completely break the law, invade there neighbors privacy, break into his house, plant stuff that records via video/audio his every move, somehow controls the house lighting, and doors.
Guy who seemingly hates everyone and there's a good reason, just mopes around for the whole movie, and as we find out is living in a semi-fantasy world where his since deceased wife is still alive and is the reason for all the weird things going on.
Eventually we find out the reason he is angry at life, and it all culminates in his death which by that time is very predictable.
Then a court case that lasts all of a few mins and is a stupid ending
Overall the only redeeming part of this movie is the flashbacks of Caan's character and his wife.
Caan killed himself because he was embarrassed to be in this film.
There is also some cameo's from an ER star playing his wife and and grandmother that has been in various Nickelodeon kids shows
BUT
The plot holes, they are apparently recording this for YouTube but when it comes to the courtcase at the end they are "not" responsible for his death, even tho they were directly the reason and they were guilty of repeatedly breaking and entering and stealing
They were caught red handed trying to clean up the crime scene by the cops, but once again. Meh they are kids.
The Night House (2020)
Suprisingly interesting
I found this title when all i was doing was just looking on IMDB for horror/thriller movies that had atleast a 6.5 overall user rating
It's a little slow getting to the conclusion and confusing as to what's actually going on for most of it, the acting isn't academy award winning and (no spoiler) the main heroine has a job as a teacher but that is only brought up twice and the rest of the time she is never at work.
BUT it kept myself and my wife invested the whole time and seemed like it was heading toward an open ending where you don't find out what was really happening.
From about the halfway point they drop a subtle clue and at the end another not so subltle clue, which comes to the end leaving you to decide yourself what really happened cause the movie doesn't blatantly tell you THIS is what were writing towards.
Overall it was suprisingly good with some fluff that didn't need to be there as it didn't add anything and coulda trimmed about 30mins of movie in the process.
The Lost City (2022)
Stupidly hilarious 😂
Had low expectations going in but other then the first 10mins which didn't give much hope it was a stupidly hilarious romp right to the end
Only negative for myself and my wife was Brad Pitt needed a bigger role.
Sandra Bulloch who never ages was her usual funny damsel in distress.
Channing Tantum was so awkward it worked
Brad Pitt was a+
Daniel Radcliffe was great
Even the supporting cast all did a great job and everyone had the chance to shine.
If you want to just forget life's crap for 90mins and have a good laugh like the 80's/90's. This is a good choice.
Uncharted (2022)
Fell asleep
So first falling asleep watching movies/tv after dinner time is not unheard of, i'm an early morning riser
BUT if it was really engaging i'd still be awake
Tried to get into this last night
Tom Holland was very Spidey like in his demeanor and the opening sequence was GREAT....
Then the main movie kicked in and it got dull fast. Fell asleep before the half way point.
It could've picked up but first opinions are usually what people go with and my first opinion was Tom was too young, Mark wasnt doing a hell of a lot to help the movie and nothing major was happening for most of that first half.
Ofcourse that's my opinion and my wiife's. Others will say otherwise.
Dog (2022)
Other then the dog, very dull
Other then the dog being in the movie which at one point is very moving, the acting in general and the flow of the movie was very dull.
Dog acting - 5 stars
Tanning Chatum acting - 3 star at best
everyone else was just there filling a roll.
Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)
Didn't last 20 mins
Acting was very dull and nothing was really set out in that first 20 mins = Turn off.
Only thing it had going for it besides the funky thumbnail for the cover was it was a return to the handycam style instead of obvious movie mode of some of the others.
Black Water: Abyss (2020)
The 2007 version was better and that's not saying much
This is even more loosely based on the same story that the 2007 is based on which is alot closer to the origin.
5 people go down an unexplored cave that is apparently "full" of croc's yet the whole movie you only see 1 maybe 2 seperate croc's. The water level rises and they are trapped. That's it.
Ends with you having to assume they escaped, just like the first one and a major plot hole at the end involving there vehicle and where it ends up.
Like the first movie they also throw in pregnancy for no reason, but add in some extra fluff.
Acting is awfull, even the croc you barely see.
Don't bother...................................................
Black Water (2007)
Not terrible, certainly not good, it just is
Based on a real story, this movie is just 90mins of staring at water and every now and then a crocadile.
Living in Australia myself, what they faced is always a possibility in the northern half of the continent, like they say, all fauna and some flora in Australia is out to kill you or make your life miserable.
As far as acting, can't say i wouldn't be freaking out too if i was in the same situation so it was ok. The crocodile was the best part of the movie tho, just the way they presented it as stalking them and giving occasional evil taunts.
Ends you just assume they escape, which some did in real life.
A pregnancy sub-plot is added in that doesn't add anything.
Halloween Kills (2021)
Not the worst in the franchise, but close & pointless.
This movie only serves one purpose, to have a stream of kills on screen in the halloween/Friday the 13th style vein.
Michael is unmasked at one point so there is that, but other then an obviously messed up eye all you see is his aged hair.
It doesn't wrap anything up, it doesn't set anything up, it just continues more of the same. Also showcases how retarded the townsfolk are when they think a fat short bald guy is Michael, even someone that encoutered when they were a child.
I really think Jamie Lee Curtis's acting which btw was the only credible acting in the movie pretty much sums it up, she looked like WTH am i still doing this.
Pink Floyd: The Wall (1982)
Wanted to love it but it doesn't add to the album
First off, I'm a Pink Floyd fan and The Wall/Dark Side Of The Moon specifically are two of my all time favorite albums of any band
So this movie is very old obviously and i've watched bits and pieces here and there over the years but i don't remember it being as bad as it was.
Visually it was i guess in tune with Pink Floyd style of all over the place & cartoony, chopping and changing from the past to the present but they IMO butchered the music for no reason and there was additional bits to songs that aren't even on the album.
Thankfully i guess. Comfortably Numb and The Wall (full version) was left relatively untouched albeit the solo in CN was a slightly different take on the original.
The acting was fine considering but overall i didn't enjoy it.
Moulin Rouge! (2001)
Couldn't survive 20mins
It may have been awesome past the 15min mark but we couldn't make it that far
That first 20 mins. Are just a lot of color and sound all mashed together to the point you can't work out what is what and only a slight incling of the storyline.
The Guilty (2021)
Jake Gyllenhaal is an ass.
Review title pretty much sums up the movie. I don't know what the original was like but his character was completely devoid of anything remotely close to anger management, social interaction skills
It was just one scene of him going off at someone or completely cutting them off when they were calling in with emergencies, and he was working as a 9-1-1 operator. WTF!!!!
He was also rude to his coworkers including his boss and that's all good apparently.
There was a plot twist which enabled him to show some compassion but the rest more then drowned that out, and there wasn't really a complete ending either.
Burial Ground Massacre (2021)
Zero talent, zero point, only 1 step above handcam production values
Couldn't last more then 15 mins, it was soo bad. Just the intro was awfull
The production values tho better then movies in the handycam vane, weren't that much better.
The acting was awfull, the opening chat between Chelsea and i guess was her mother was cringe worthy. The "mother" was clearly reading a script and very badly, it was jerky, monotone and she wasn't even looking at the person she was meant to be talking too.
Only lasted a few mins longer before had to turn it off.
It might have gotten considerably better after that but i wanted my life back. Saying that we went onto watch something else that wasn't much better.
Escape Room: Tournament of Champions (2021)
Super brainy people with no charisma solving rediculous puzzles for no reason
So, some of the same people return from the first one to once again enter a "game show" in the vein of Running Man where they are always on the verge of death for what reason exactly????
I dunno, but it's just super fast Quick Quick Quick find the answer out of thin air only to move onto yet another of the same
Plot hole central the whole movie. At one point some people are assumed dead yet one is revealed as saved later on yet the other who succumed to the same fate was not? Not that you'd care about him anyway
Plot twist at the end which besides making zero sense for the most part considering the events of the rest of the movie. Leaves room for an obvious 3rd movie.
Don't Breathe 2 (2021)
Average at best
You can't sympathize with the main character as he just an a nasty piece of work. Sure i can see that he has had a hard life and doesn't trust anyone but his emo attitude comes off as i don't care about anyone or anything.
He's now adopted a daughter inbetween the events of the first movie and second movie but he treats her like a prisoner until toward the later half of the movie.
The fighting is completely unbelievable (not in a good way). Including fully sick ninja avoiding skills by both the "hero" and his daughter The bad guys are typically stupid.
Also they throw in extra additonal elements to the reason why the criminals are even there just for the sake of adding to the already thin plot.
The original movie wasn't good, this was even worse, except there was more "enemies"
The only redeeming part of the movie was the stellar performance by both dogs, i felt for both of them having to put up with being involved.
Bushwick (2017)
Nothing redeeming, 90mins of my life wasted
Gonna keep it brief.
Acting is awfull
Camera work is shoddy
Music score doesn't match what's going on
And the ending was pointless.
The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)
A good murder mystery, not really a horror/thriller - minor spoilers
So for the first time since Jumanji 3 in December 2019 myself and my wife returned to the cinema and we weren't dissapointed.
I will start off by saying it was the weakest in the series, but by no means was it a bad movie, atleast for us.
The acting was solid and the direction was different "literally" to all the previous movies in the Conjuring universe tho still similar. The Warren's still stole the show
They did seem to cut out some bits, assumedly were to be included but cut to reduce the film to around 2hrs. For instance at one point Ed told someone he would introduce them to Annabelle to show that what they did was real but you never see that happen.
A familiar face also returns to join the Warren's but that's about it as far as links to the other 6 movies
To keep it short as others have already said what is to be said.
It's more of a murder/mystery with some horror elements and overly loud sound effects and a love story thrown in to cement the bond between the Warren's.
At just under 2hrs it wasn't a drag but the last 30mins were definately alot faster then the first 90mins
The actress who played Debbie Glatzel, is the Soda Stream Ad girl lol and Ruairi O'Connor who plays Arne, in the movie is a dead ringer for a Skaarsgard but in real life is a llok alike of Skaarsgard/Ramsay Bolton lol.
The Resort (2021)
Not a single redeemable point
I will say i think the "actors" if you can call them that did the best they could with a lack of production/story
Overall it's boring from start to finish, the acting is very C grade at best
The production values is above handcam but still not good,
Inconsistancies often. At one point the heroin has a backpack and in the next scene it's gone.
It does have a twist at the end but well before that point you'll be looking to see how much longer the snoozefest goes for.
The Babysitter (2017)
Soft Porn, Comedy Horror in one film = win
Nothing bad to say, It's a horror comedy in every sense
The acting is very good considering the script, there isn't a bad one of the bunch
It's a fun, laugh from start to finish and an unexpected twist at the end
Braid (2018)
Promise turned into stupidity
A very thin premise with zero sense making along the way. Numerous major plot holes thrown in
Seems all three involved are off there rockers and it becomes pretty apparent why the main instigator is the way she is very early on
The only thing that worked for me was Sarah Hay in a schoolgirl outfit
This is a must not watch otherwise.
Z (2019)
Suprisingly good
Great acting,
The idea is not new that a kid has a "imaginary friend" convincing him to do evil
but it still carries it off as fresh with a nice swerve towards the end that is clearly inspired by other movies of a similar storyline.
Now saying that there was a few downsides
There was a whole bit where the 2 main sisters lost there mother but that didn't add anything to the story other then one scene where the mother refused physical contact that made sense later on.
and a disaster destroys a house but there's no police, no firefighters no neighbours when clearly they were in a neighborhood. and the aunty seemingly forgets about her child at one point.
Relic (2020)
Hits close to home
It's an all Australian cast, directed/produced in Australia, however thjey went all out with the production team which apparently consisted of Jake Gyllenhaal, and both RUsso brothers (Marvel movie universe fame)
The primary premise is the downward slide of a family mamber battling dimentia but then take it into an alternate route adding in horror elements
The acting across the board for the most part seems very realistic for how people would react in the situation of dealing with a loved one that appears to be losing it and of someone who no longer knows what's happening to them.
Robin Nevan as the elderly mother/grandmother Edna really shines, she is truly creepy in the movie.
The Big Show Show (2020)
Like a 90's sitcom.
It does what it sais on the tin
Steve Urkel is in the cast. and boy does he look and sound different.
All the actors are doing a good job of entertaining, the storylines are fairly stock standard nothing ever goes right but gets wrapped up in a happy bow by the end of episode.
I will say for anyone who watches Simon Miller on WhatCultureWrestling he has a segment called "Nobody talks like that" and that pretty much sums up alot of the dialogue in this show. Not that that is a bad thing, it's a good happy break from reality
Paul Wight (The Big Show) i'm suprised it's taken this long for him to land something like this, he's proven in his WWF/WWE run that he can hang with the best of em when it comes to comedy, not so good in a serious role but in comedy he's pretty good. In this show he more then carries himself
The star of the show tho is the youngest daughter, she's so devious. Think Bart Simpson meets Pinky from PInky and The Brain.
Negatives, there's only a few references to his actual wrestling career, some subtle plugs for Smackdown in the background of the daughters room and so far only 3 cameo's by felow wrestlers and that doesn't occur in the first 5 episodes atleast.
The Happy Happy Joy Joy acting of the mother and the 2 elder daughters does drag on abit if you binge watch.
Overall well worth a watch to escape the Covid reality atm