Reviews

41 Reviews
Sort by:
Filter by Rating:
4/10
Hilariously bad
5 March 2024
I gotta hand it to Zack Snyder- the dude obviously has never met a cliche he didn't want to grab with both hands and make out with.

This (Im guessing?) loose re-telling of Seven Samurai is so bad and so ridiculous that it takes hate watching to whole new heights. We laughed our butts off!

Throw in scenes ripped off from every blockbuster you can think of (Harry Potter, Witness, The Blue Brothers, Star Wars, the 1984 Dune, Firefly, Star Wars again, Rebel without a Cause, more Star Wars...), a list of actors that look like more famous actors, a metric ton of racial pandering, weird accents, lots of high-wasted pants (!), the obligatory space nazis, and SO MUCH SLOW MO! And you have a snark-fest to warm the cockles of your snickering little heart.

Frankly, I can't wait to trash Part 2!
3 out of 4 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Star Wars: Visions (2021– )
4/10
Incredibly disappointing
22 September 2023
I only watched season 1 and only a few episodes were really any good. In fact, if you watch the first and last episodes you have seen the best of it.

I cannot believe they made such a big deal out of this. Some of the episodes (2-4 specifically) are just utter trash. It's almost embarrassing.

Episode 1 is great and I quite liked 8- though the style is 100% from a similar rabbit/samari comic that I forget the name of.

Ep 9 is top drawer- original, well scripted, voiced and drawn. Loved it! I wish there had been more like it.

The rest is blah at best though episode 5 is at least on brand.

Could do better.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
A Discovery of Witches (2018–2022)
4/10
Hokey and lazy. I was expecting more.
22 February 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Full disclosure: I read the books first and was reasonably excited about the show. However, I just finished Season 1 and I won't be continuing.

The acting is OK- some of the casting is good, some just ok. I didn't have any problem with Teresa Palmer as some did. She does as well as she can with the script. The writing is lazy at best, simplistic and nonsensical in the extreme. It gets worse and worse as the season goes on.

The writing was just so basic. It was really disappointing. They took a great book and turned it into a hokey, low budget blah-fest.

The vampires rarely show their extreme strength or speed. None of the magic (there is very little) is explained beyond simplistic jargon. The power exchanges within the congregation are either completely opaque or clearly stated in stilted dialog, ("I am going to do this because this.") There is simply no finesse in what is supposed to be a high-stakes diplomatic situation.

Trying to spice things up (one imagines), the writers take MANY liberties with the plot and add all kinds of idiotic plot twists, but not in any kind of coherent manner.

Any sign of violence is glossed over and padded down. The (in the book) pivotal and horrible scene where Diana is tortured over and over to reveal her power comes off as plodding, almost boring in the show.

Diana herself seems to lack agency in many scenes- especially ones in which she is in danger. She is not shown as a fighter, but rather almost a bystander of the action around her. Her relationship with Matthew is basically him telling her what to do and her saying "wow. Ok, yes." with wide-eyed wonder. (Needless to say, this is not like the book.)

Apart from the first few episodes there is no suspense. No wonder. Unfortunately this show is not worth the time it took to make it.

I had many other problems with the production and editing, but I will spare you. If the show had been better written I would have gleefully ignored them, myself.
0 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Bullet Train (2022)
5/10
Cute but Guy Ritchie does it better
7 November 2022
"Cute" is really the nicest thing I can say about this.

Editing is simply awful (I mean really really bad) and some of the casting choices were really terrible. Brian Tyree Henry and Aaron Taylor-Johnson try valiantly to bring some depth to their duo with some success. Bad Bunny is great, actually, but Brad Pitt is simply inane as he trods through the same stupid character he's been revisiting periodically since True Romance.

I usually love Michael Shannon, but he is horribly miscast here, and Andrew Koji is just horrible- but maybe it's the wig?

Everyone would have done better with a script that had been sent through several solid rounds of edits, however. Its hard to make something out of nothing, to be fair.

This said, the production and art direction were very good. Every single visual style choice polished to within an inch of its life, making it more of an advertisement than a film. The concept is strong and visually appealing, but every encounter lacks depth. The absolutely shameless and unceasing product placement only underlines this.

On top of all this, action was just ok.

Frankly, Guy Ritchie does it better.
1 out of 4 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
5/10
Practically no women involved
16 May 2022
Though I loved this anthology and some of the episodes are truly fantastic, I am disappointed to see almost no female directors and only one female writer in 3 seasons.

In the first season (the longest) there are no women at all behind the scenes- only on camera. (Not always with their clothes off, to be fair.)

It left a bad taste in my mouth.

Im so happy to see animators working. Its such a difficult industry to produce in and yet, this series did not even try to let any female animators (and they are legion) tell their stories. Im positive there are women out there who have sexy, freaky, horrifying stories to tell.

Do better.
5 out of 48 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Swan Song (II) (2021)
8/10
I adored this movie
4 April 2022
It's rare to find a film that enchants you, makes you laugh, makes you cry. It is a beautiful film and I loved every minute. You will fall in love with Pat. I did.
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Somebody Somewhere (2022– )
10/10
So many feels
3 March 2022
I just absolutely ADORE this show.

The writing, the acting, the realness, the music, the heart. It's funny, it's beautiful, it's sad and it's perfect.

Do yourself a favor.
27 out of 32 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
1/10
never has a movie made me so angry
17 September 2021
I love Peter Jackson but it he had been standing outside the cinema when I walked out of this movie I would have kicked him to the ground.

The Hobbit is just not something you should mess with.

I was so excited to hear it was being adapted and after the Lord of the Rings Trilogy I had no reason to suspect that this production would take such needless and heinous liberties with this perfect story just to stretch it out for 3 films.

Shame on you, Guillermo, and shame on whatever jerk producer decided to whore this exquisite classic out for profit. Shame!
2 out of 12 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
The Umbrella Academy (2019–2024)
7/10
first season is crap, second season is phenomenal!
2 September 2021
Frankly, the first season, apart from a few moments/characters is a total wash: bad script, bad character development, bad editing, Alison's weird little bun, and a completely embarrassing use of popular music to gloss over the fact that everything is a cliche.

Some things I did like: Klaus, Klaus' pants, Mary J Blige, Number 5 (to a point), the robot mom.

Things I hated: everything else

Someone had to twist my arm to make me watch the second season- and I am so glad they did!!! Basically, someone with talent came in and fixed all the bad stuff!!! Plus they added an actual cinematographer, and a decent sound editor, and probably a real writer for the script! Its like Christmas!

All of the actors that seemed so blah before now rock! Because they actually have depth to their characters! Lines they can say without cringing! And we get what we want: a story that actually interests us about people who actually care about each other (to a point).

SEVEN. STARS (up from 5)
3 out of 4 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Guns Akimbo (2019)
7/10
Well I, for one, loved this movie!
13 June 2020
I loved it and so did the two people I watched it with.

Yes, the movie is super violent. Yes, the violence is gratuitous. Yes, it is funny, but the humor is pretty NZ. (I actually laughed at one liners!!! Those that know me, know this is not my M.O.)

This movie is smart and silly and cliche in all the right ways. The camera work is crazy fast and a little nauseating at times, but you have to admire the creativity and sheer manic dedication. We all particularly loved the video game flourishes.

In fact, visually the movie is excellent, and we all agreed that the production value is off the chain. (Good work, everyone!) Acting is also excellent.

My personal favorite: the script is pretty tight- especially for a shoot 'em up, action film like this. It is fast and you have to pay attention. The writing doesn't spoon feed you anything, you have to keep up. Is the story ridiculous? YES! Does it follow some sort of logic? Yes again! I wasn't going to review this film until I saw all of the negative reviews which are frankly unmerited. I think a lot of people are put off by the female bad ass who shows no tit, does not fall in love, and remains a bad ass to the end. Yay sexism!
27 out of 38 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Avenue 5 (2020–2022)
8/10
Freakin' brilliant!
16 April 2020
The absurdity is so full-on and so very, very funny, but don't think for one moment that this is not a deeply intelligent show. Script writing is tight and wickedly comic. Such a joy to watch!
1 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
9/10
far more than just bikinis
11 March 2020
I honestly did not expect to love this movie as much as I did. Frankly, it's beautiful, disturbing and profound.

I did not find it sexist or rapey in the least. Stop reading reviews and go in eyes blind.
3 out of 6 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Sorority Boys (2002)
6/10
Way better than expected
17 December 2019
I gotta be honest, this movie is pretty stupid, but some thought definitely went into it and the acting is good. The wigs are EXCELLENT. I mean top shelf. Beats the hell out of Porky's or Revenge of the Nerds.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
5/10
Terrible script and That's coming from a Jarmusch fan
23 September 2019
This movie should have been epic but the script was under done, meandering (not in a good way), and flat. Characters are so one dimensional that even all of the really brilliant actors couldn't pull them off. It was (and I can't believe I'm writing this about a Jarmusch movie) cutesy at best, with lots of sassy little moments which clashed horribly with the very slow plot development and dialog delivery. I feel like we re missing about 45 minutes of more screen time to round out the story, the dialog and the action. The zombies certainly had fun, but not nearly enough to justify watching this profoundly boring film. Very disappointed.
1 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
The Rook (2019)
2/10
pretty disappointing so far
9 July 2019
I loved the book but this adaptation seems to take out everything that was creative and unique and dumb it down to just another stupid cop show. I am not liking the new plot lines and new characters, which seem unnecessary, just like all the other changes from the novel. Acting is ok, but the hokey soundtrack and sub par camera work ruin any good that might be there.

Also, where is the dark humor? This production has taken something great and churned out the usual pap. Bravo.
36 out of 50 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Ocean's Eight (2018)
5/10
Underwhelmed
11 February 2019
Considering the vaguely solid script and the considerably more solid cast of actors this movie should have been better. It's lacking pizzazz. You really get the impression no one had fun making this film. Its like the entire cast (especially Blanchett and Bullock) are just phoning it in. All the fabulous coats in the world cannot keep this film from fizzling out. (Also, why don't they just say that Blanchett and Bullock were at one time a couple? They certainly act like this is the case and it would have sealed a few holes in the script...)

To note: Sarah Paulson is her usual excellent self. Anne Hathaway is at her best and Rhianna is quite good, as well.
0 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
4/10
One big cliché
11 February 2019
Excellent acting doesn't save this script from hitting every single cliché you can think of. The story line meanders with few surprises, quite a lot of inexplicable jumps in plot which rip off of at least a dozen movies from the 60s 70s and 80s.

But I mean, what do you expect from the guy who wrote World War Z? I really like The Cabin in the Woods, but ever since then its been all downhill.

Still, all the actors make valiant efforts, even though some TRULY cringe-worthy dialogue.
1 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
French Women (2014)
4/10
Half-feminism
11 February 2019
The film is cute with some fairly obvious problems with script. Only some of the actresses are excellent. I was seriously disappointed by how this "female power" movie fell into the same old misogynistic tropes when it came to sex. I guess baby steps are all we can expect from bourgeois France.
2 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Amiko (2017)
7/10
Girl power at its finest
9 January 2019
I saw this movie at the Japanese Cuts film festival. Yoko Yamanaka spoke to us before the presentation and basically apologized for the bad film quality. It IS a low budget film and they totally could have used better sound in a few scenes, but frankly, the film is such a treat, no one in the theatre could have cared less.

This coming of age story is both funny and poetic. Amiko is so charming she burns up the screen. The final scene is perfect and left me breathless and excited in a way few films manage to do.

This whole film was like a wonderful cool drink of water. I highly recommend it and will watch anything Yamanaka makes in the future.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
7/10
Marvellously Politically Incorrect
12 November 2018
Lets take out everyday racism and examine it under the bright light of comedy!

This very very funny film is a no holds barred look at bourgeois french culture, and multi-culture. I nearly peed my pants I laughed so hard. Totally worth your time whether you're french or not.
12 out of 16 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Zoom (2015)
8/10
This movie was such a pleasure!
27 September 2018
I loved it, I laughed, it kept me totally on my toes!

The acting is great, the cinematography is excellent and the script is tight. The whole time I was watching I just couldn't believe more people did not tell me about it! So very clever! Do not hesitate! Watch it!
2 out of 4 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Happy! (2017–2019)
10/10
About the best a show can be
16 August 2018
It's violent, twisted, and totally nuts. I loved every freakin' minute!

Just when you think you have it all figured out, out comes another layer of madness. A plot line so wild and yet so neatly stitched together as to be more than worthy of the many, many excellent actors, fantastic editing and pure gorgeous art direction.

Not for the faint at heart, but totally fantastic- if you like things a bit gritty.
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Barely Lethal (2015)
5/10
surprisingly cute
31 July 2018
This was a surprise, and some fine acting saves this film from Disney TV territory. Though much of the plot hinges on inexplicable behaviour- (Why is Jessica Beal so angry? Even she doesn't seem to know!) cute dialog and charming vignettes make this teen friendly film a pleasant and even funny watch.
1 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
My Big Night (2015)
8/10
Non-stop fantastic
23 July 2018
This film is a hilarious, well shot, glorious mix of every kind of mayhem you can imagine. Super over the top, yet full of endearing moments and an attention to detail that blew me away. I loved it! One of the better Alex de la Iglesia films.
6 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
9/10
I already liked it but Season 4 is the best yet!!!
12 June 2018
Season 3 was luke warm, but the writing in Season 4 has been AMAZING! I am loving it!!!
3 out of 6 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
An error has occured. Please try again.

Recently Viewed