Snakes on a Plane (2006)
Gerard Plunkett: Paul
Photos
Quotes
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Mercedes Harbont : Why don't we just take a picture?
Paul : Oh, sure, let's drop it off at Jiffy Photo when we land, Einstein.
Mercedes Harbont : Ever heard of e-mail, dick-wad?
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Paul : Fucking dog, fucking coach, fucking Americans!
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Paul : [Having just thrown a small dog to be eaten by one of the snakes, much to everyone's disapproval] You'd have done the exact same thing!
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Claire Miller : I'm sorry but first class is overbooked, but there is plenty of room to stretch out in coach which is only half-full.For the inconvenience we would like to offer you this travel voucher which is good on any date for any South Pacific Airlines flight.
Paul : Hmm, and this travel voucher won't help get me to my meeting on time, will it?
Claire Miller : Sir, I'm pretty sure that coach gets to Los Angeles about the same time that first class does.
Paul : Funny. Does my Senior Reward membership come with your sarcasm, or should I speak with your supervisor... Claire?
[walks into the plane]
Claire Miller : This had better be a matter of national security,
Mercedes Harbont : Did I just hear right that there's no first class?
Claire Miller : Yes, only coach.
Mercedes Harbont : Is it safe back there?
Tiffany : [after a pause] Yes, yes, it is totally safe there.
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Paul : Why exactly are there snakes on this plane?
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Paul : [throws the tiny dog to the snake to slow it down, everyone screams as it's eaten] What? You'd have done exactly the same thing!