- Dr. Mark Craig: [looking at an x-ray] There's a liver not long for this world.
- Dr. Daniel Auschlander: It's mine.
- Dr. Mark Craig: Do me a favor, say "moose and squirrel".
- Natasha: [in her thick Russian accent] Moose and squirrel.
- Dr. Mark Craig: That's what I thought.
- Nurse: I could have you legally committed.
- Trekkie: If we ever need a Klingon, we'll let you know!
- Everybody: You're a pig, Ehrlich.